All Things Gwen

Billy’s 30th Birthday – Go Big or Go Home!

April 20, 2011

I go through these phases where I love to write. Right now is not one of them. I mean, I still love to write, but I simply have no voice. No creativity. My fingertips are not moving faster than I can even think. I have nothing important, significant, thought provoking or interesting to share. Therefore, I suck.

I have this goal to have an awesome blog where people love to read my thoughts, leave comments and think I’m really awesome. Well, I’m not really awesome. I have nothing good to write about. I’ve hit a drought. Life has enveloped me. I’m tired. I’ve used up all my extra energy and creativity.

Where did it go? I think everything I had was used on my hubby’s 30th birthday party. See, I work in marketing and we do a lot of events. His birthday party was an event. No big strategy, corporate initiative or anything like that — but the logistics and stress was all there.

This is how it all went down:
Read the rest of this entry »

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Nevermind the Naysayers

April 13, 2011

Wise words on a Starbucks cup: “The world burst at the seams with people ready to tell you you’re not good enough. On occasion, some may be correct. But do not do their work for them. Seek any job; ask anyone out; pursue any goal. Don’t take it personally when they say “no” — they may not be smart enough to say “yes.” – Keith Olbermann

Without a doubt, there will be people that:
… talk behind your back.
… one-up your latest accomplishment.
… have a comment for everything.
… don’t want you to succeed.

Why? Because people:
… are jerks.
… are jealous.
… don’t want you to have more than them.
… don’t want to be left behind.

Unfortunately, that’s just life. But, you have to be strong, determined and really push to get whatever you want. Maybe you want to lose weight, change careers or move out of state. Whatever it is, don’t let the naysayers talk you out of it. Of course, people will offer their opinion — and it’s great to take it, especially if they are experienced in whatever you’re trying to achieve … but, as with anything in life, you might just have to learn by doing.

Here are my tips:
1. Set a goal.
2. Research.
3. Plan.
4. Complete steps to meet your goal.
5. Regroup.
6. Start over if necessary.

And:
1. Stay positive.
2. Be consistent.
3. Give it your best effort.
4. Don’t give up too easy.
5. Forget the naysayers.
6. Go with your gut.
7. Celebrate your successes.
8. Take note of who’s on your team.

That’s all. Just go for it. If you want it, you can have it.

Photo by Wonderlane.

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Be Happy Where You Are

April 5, 2011

Jamaica. We COULD NOT WAIT for our honeymoon!

When I was younger, I kept chasing something.

Grade school: As soon as I get to high school …
High school: As soon as I get my license …
College: As soon as I’m out in the real world …
Post-college: As soon as I have my own place …

If you knew me growing up, you’d think I was the most happy, spunky, spirited person. That truly is me — but deep down, there was another side. I questioned myself. I had self-doubt. I wasted time comparing myself to others and thinking that material things and life accomplishments would make me complete.

I always thought that if I could just have _______ (fill in the blank), things would be so much better. I filled that blank — literally and figuratively — with: a boyfriend, a house, a car, a job I loved, more money. I needed so many things and I wouldn’t be happy until I got it all. But, as I crossed off my list, I realized I was only temporarily happy — putting a band-aid on things. And, as one thing was accomplished, the list never got shorter. I’d want something else — because nothing could be enough.

Years of reflection
I spent years wondering why I felt so bad, why I wasn’t truly happy. I didn’t want it to be that way. Maybe it was a self-esteem thing. Maybe it was lack of life experience. Maybe it was just the true butterfly waiting to emerge from cocoon! But, instead of just accepting unhappiness, I really focused on finding ways to love myself and my life.

In grade school, I started to keep a journal. I wrote to express my sadness — to wish for what I wanted my life to look like, to try to understand things that didn’t make sense, and to try to escape the pain I felt when people treated me poorly. I kept writing up until I met my husband. I was 28.

When we met, I was happy. I had focused on myself for a good year, figuring out what I loved to do, who my true friends are, and how to best use my talents. I believe I truly loved myself first, and that’s why it worked. I told myself that I’d never compromise my true self again.

Maybe this blog is my journal now.

The real me
I guess what I really wanted from life was to be loved for the real me, to hold on to my values and be appreciated for them. My hubs lets me be the real me. I don’t hold back. I don’t have to dress a certain way or act a certain way to keep his love. Trust me, I was that way in past relationships — and it requires too much work to be something you’re not. For example, I always felt pressured to drink to fit in. To be honest, I don’t drink at all. I don’t like it, I feel sick when I do … so I don’t. (Look up Asian flush — that’s me.)

Instead, my life is rich with awesome friends, a loving husband and big family. And, I’ve realized an optimistic attitude will only bring in more positive things to my life.

For you
If you’re sad or unhappy, please realize that you’re not the only one. Even those that appear happy — and even rich with material things — have struggles and insecurities. Love who you are, don’t be so tough on yourself and remember you are on the right path.

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